My friends make a cocktail with Malort, White Monster, and C4 preworkout. They also have a multi-year running gag where they offer me a bottle of fine whiskey or bourbon at a campfire but it has in fact been replaced by Malort. Then, when I am choking and gagging someone else offers me some water to wash away the taste, which is in fact also Malort.
> My friends make a cocktail with Malort, White Monster, and C4 preworkout.
Fuck me I almost gagged reading that. The rest is just a horror story. That would be the camping trip I return from alone and immediately call a criminal defense lawyer.
I'm a complete weirdo apparently who really likes the flavor of malort, it's bitter and herbal and so if you like those flavors you'll enjoy it. I kinda resent the amount of marketing that the new owners have churned out hyping it up, although I do appreciate what they're doing.
If you think you might enjoy it, give it a shot I'd describe the flavor as sweetened church pew, then grapefruit bitterness. If you're not expecting it you'll almost certainly hate it, but it's really not that bad.
I find it just fine as well. I feel like a generation of marketing around Malort was "it's really gross!", but it's a distinct taste that I don't think a chunk of people would find so offensive if they weren't heavily primed before trying it.
I'd be curious how it fares internationally. To me it just tastes to me like an anise liqueur with a pronounced bitterness.
I wouldn't be in a hurry to take a big swig of it, but that strikes me a little bit like taking a big swig of soy sauce and concluding it tastes awful.
I have a theory that our flavor pallet is flexible, and if you continue to consume something your body things is nourishing, it'll eventually flip a switch in your brain where it becomes palatable.
I'm sure someone has done research on this, but I'm unaware of any.
I'm pretty sure this is known, at least for bitter tastes. Coffee, alcohol, bitter vegetables, dark chocolate, etc., tend to be acquired tastes to at least some degree. Even if you don't dislike them on first try, you probably grew to enjoy them more as you continued trying them.
I tried it hoping it would be kind of vaguely like Absinthe mixed with w/ grapefruit extract and quinine, but it just tasted like burning gasoline or jet fuel to me.
There are much finer versions of it, and if you’re in Chicago Binnies carries one by Letherbee “Bësk” and if you like that bitter grapefruit/wormwood flavor, it is mana from heaven
I also really like it, I have a bottle in the pantry.
The first time I had it (in Chicago of course), I asked the bartender what it tasted like before trying it as my friends had been building up how bad it was. She said, “It tastes like the day my Father left us.”
I have friends who make custom shirts with the Malört logo and the text “Malört: because fuck you.”
Every batch is different, some are more bitter than others. I think the new owners were planning to change that, but I feel like it hurts the appeal. The surprise is part of the fun.
I do not mind the taste, most of the time. Some bottles are especially bad though.
I like mine neat with a couple dashes of bitters. It's a lovely sipping drink.
I hate that whenever I try to order that at a bar, the bartender thinks I'm just being an idiot to show off. I can't see how it's any more of an acquired taste than something like single malt or calvados. Which, coincidentally, also make for thoroughly disgusting shots.
I wouldn't down half a tin of breath mints in one go, either.
I like it fine, it doesn't taste especially unusual among other herbal bitter liquors, a category I like. It's not the best (or as expensive as the best! they can get pricey), but it's not the worst, it's a fine drink.
The NYT story above mostly stayed away from how it's become known as like "the worst drink ever" or something, something you drink as a kind of challenge rather than that it's enjoyable.
I've suspected that the manufacturer has been actually encouraging this story. In the age of "challenges", a narrative that this is an incredibly hard to drink thing that's a challenge to drink is actually good marketting, that has been part of it's successful national awareness?
It's not especially challenging, it's just an herbal bitter, which is not for everyone, sure. But it's not gross, it's a fine drink -- and ironically saying this, that it's not actually exceptionally bad, hurts it's marketing! Better to be exceptionally noteworthy bad than simply typical.
Most commonly it is pickled herring. I don't think rotten herring is a thing in any broader circles.
Homemade bäsk is usually much better than factory made Bäska Droppar, if you enjoy the taste of wormwood more than just being slapped in the face with artificial bitterness and sugar.
Of course, if you hate the taste of fish, pickled things and spirits in general, you are unlikely to enjoy any of it.
Also not quite the same as rotten! And, I would hazard a guess that the consumption ratio of inlagd-sill to surströmming is at least 1000:1, maybe 100000:1.
Aquavit equally disgusting? I guess I should try malört :) Aquavit with beer chaser and https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pinnekj%C3%B8tt is a great Christmas dish (but I would die if I didn't keep it to Christmas)
wish moxie brand sodas wouldve done a similar marketing strategy to gain a better foothold in the northeast market. they got bought out by coca cola and nerfed any bitterness to have it resemble more like a flat root beer.
What are some other liquors in its category? Because it's much higher proof and lower sugar content than the bitter liquors people drink more or less unmixed.
There are probably some similarly high proof amaros out there but they're pretty rare even within that category and an american would probably only encounter them mixed into a cocktail if even then. Fernet branca sure but that's much less bitter. Malort is actually very unusual compared to campari, or suze or something along those lines. Much more bitter, more alcoholic and less sweet than the norm for these drinks.
Yes, Americans don't historically usually drink amaros or bitters. Amaros seem to be gaining in popularity though, perhaps the malort resurgence is part of that trend.
Right, it's a herbal bitter, not citrus like campari. And not an especially sweet one.
I am not good at remembering brand names there are so many. One I enjoy that comes in tiny little bottles and does have a bit of a foothold in the USA is the digestif Underberg.
Sure, that whole category will be seen by some Americans who are not interested in bitter and digestifs as not particularly palatable. But still nothing special about Malort.
Wikipedia says "Malört is an American brand of bäsk liqueur, ", with bäsk being a Swedish wormwood-based thing. Googling for wormwood amaros finds a variety to try, if the wormwood bitters is what you're looking for. The good ones will taste a lot better (and be a lot more expensive) than Malort, because, right, Malort isn't especially great, it's true.
i had Malort for the first time only a few years ago. I was like, wait, this is it? OK, it's a not especially great example of the category, it's kind of mediocre, but I've drank plenty of the category and don't find it especially hard to drink.
But "a mediocre bitter digestif" is obviously not as good marketing as "the worst drink on the planet, drink it as a challenge and impress your friends".
I think Underberg is a good comp. The problem with Malort is not that its bitter or the flavor profile of it, its the _quality_ of the drink. Underberg is bitter but well made and it tells dramatically when drinking them side by side.
Amaro's generally speaking are _very_ popular in Chicago. When I first moved here and was more of an out at bars type of person it was _extremely_ common to drink Amaro, especially at the end of a work night. But you'd drink the amaro's you'd expect (Fernet especially). No one would choose Malort because it wasn't any cheaper than a good amaro and was just worse.
The story of Malort is the story of good marketing and pre-social media 'influencers' getting involved. The book mentioned in the article also covers the quirky story of the original Malort brand and its interesting if you like that sort of thing. But as a drink its just uninteresting.
Unicum might be another good comparable, that's actually good if you like that sort of thing?
You want something that I think really is so bad that I have trouble imagining it's not just a novelty challenge drink -- and yet I think it's not and some people really do like it -- while even sticking to Nordic region (they like some weird stuff)....
"Salty" licorice is a misnomer, there's nothing actually salty about it, the "salt" is ammonium chloride. It's vodka flavored with black licorice (I'm with you so far), and the taste of ammonia.
Oh yeah I'm not saying Malort is good. i find it mediocre. I feel like I've had worse (which I can't remember the name of because why). I enjoy em enough that if i was at a bar that only had Malort I'd drink it. (I don't like the menthol in Fernet Branca, although many do. Malort has no menthol flavor as I recall?)
But the marketing campaign, whether crowdsourced viral or intended, is that it's like this uniquely horrible thing.
If anyone is familiar with the category and enjoys it (certainly not everyone does), they won't find it particularly hard to drink or unusual. They will find it not very good, yes. Obviously that's not something you want to market.
As you say, it's not interesting. But "the worst drink you'll ever have" would of course be very interesting! It's not that Malort is great, it's that in fact it's not interesting at all, it's just a mediocre bitter digestif.
I think the Nordic countries' Aquavit is more like Malort than the Italian Amaros are.
Fun fact: The Nordics are so cold, to age their Aquavit in casks, some producers would load them up on ships and send them to the equator and back. Linie Aquavit still does this tradition.
Personally, Italian Amaros are much better than Aquavit or Malort though. Forget Fernet when there's Averna.
I don't think Aquavit is very similar to Malort at all. They lack the bitterness and extreme astringency. Aquavit is more like gin but with a different botanical lineup.
I thought it was pretty similar to Suze in bitterness, although I didn't try them side by side. It's about twice as strong, though. And neither is sweet enough to save you!
I'm not sure. I was about to say yes but looking it up now probably what I had was arnbitter. I quit drinking over a decade ago too so I'm starting to get even more fuzzy on what I have and haven't tried.
> I've suspected that the manufacturer has been actually encouraging this story. In the age of "challenges", a narrative that this is an incredibly hard to drink thing that's a challenge to drink is actually good marketting, that has been part of it's successful national awareness?
The Streisand Effect works. Plus, in a crowded market, anything to set yourself apart is a win.
Then you will be disappointed by Malort, which is one-dimensionally vile and without any charm. The sad thing is Chicago is a big amaro town; Malort is to a serious amaro what a bottle of 70% isopropyl is to Glenrothes 18.
I happen to enjoy malort, so there's probably something wrong with me.
Malort has been seeing wider distribution recently, which i hear may due to a buyout a while ago. Their website lists distribution in Delaware, Maryland, DC, and randomly checking San Francisco shows availability as well.
No more having to visit Chicago to purchase it enables a lot more people to buy it and businesses to serve it.
The weird Chicago only malort variants do disturb me, but i would try them.
From what I am reading Malort sounds like a bad combo between a disgusting smokey scotch* and Fernet, a liquor that tastes the way a public mens bathroom smells like on a hot day when chilled.
And you compare that to black coffee? Shame on you.
They're not even in the same universe. I don't love Fernet, but I appreciate it, and can taste things in it; it tastes like lots of different herbs and spices, some of them unpalatable. On the other hand, to make homemade Malort, simply mix Windex, Everclear, and sugar.
Malort has been available at Total Wine and More for over a year. That's when I bought some and forced my friends into all trying it, and they all agreed it was terrible.
The variants are what worry me; it seems to defeat the purpose of a drink that built a reputation on being "unenjoyable" to make it more palatable while using the brand name for cachet.
All that to say, I tried barrel aged Malort -- it mellows down the flavor, so sure it's "better," but again what's the point? There are plenty of better tasting shots out there.
Malört is the name of the herb wormwood in Swedish.
The swedish name means "clothing moth herb", and has been used to fight cloth moths among other uses. Also especially popular spirit flavoring, which it's latin name hints of.
Not sure about the ones mentioned in the article, but for the kind I'm used to (i.e Bäsk) in Sweden it's a given.
In our family it's generally been a tradition to go out in the night of August 24th each year to pick some wormwood, and then infuse some plain alcohol with it to have for the coming months. We generally don't leave it in as long recipes call for though, 24h instead of multiple days so the taste is a bit milder.
Its the day when all farmers should be done harvesting and autumn officially begins according to "Bondepraktikan" [1], which says to be done by St Bartholomews day.
Like many old traditions the reasons have for many become lost to time, and now it's an accepted fact that that's the magical night to get some wormwood.
Without the purchase-to-fulfill-a-gag market, it probably would have shut down decades ago.
The new owners are a serious distillery, and doing the best job possible with the recipe. This will lead to people drinking it for reasons other than a gag, but will that grow to be enough to leave the joke behind?
It pisses me off, because there's no reason for it to exist. There are good products with the same flavor profile Malort attempts (and fails), but Malort swamps them in the market. There's even non-Jeppson Malort now. It's all a stunt.
Just chase it with an Old Style or twelve and whatever Malört tastes like to you will soon be only a nostalgic memory from your one trip late at night to Logan.
My first thought exactly! I have never heard of Malört outside of the cryptography/security industry, where offering it is seemingly used as a hazing ritual.
I went on a stag do (bachelor party for non-Brits) last year. The groom had just returned from Chicago on a business trip the morning we went away. He brought back a bottle of Malört.
I developed a taste for it that weekend - it's not that bad (I'd take it over something like Becharovka). Annoyingly years ago (2009ish) I spent a fair amount of time over in the Midwest with work and never drank the stuff.
Must be a British thing as I’m the same. Been to Chicago a few times and had a few shots of Malort and it’s totally fine. Maybe it’s the coriander-tastes-like-soap thing for some people.
Ok, Malört is the name of an alcoholic beverage. It is unclear to me why a liquid would be called a "princess" but maybe it reflects the jargon of aficionados.
Malört was introduced in Chicago in the 1930s and was long produced by the Carl Jeppson Company. In 2018, as its last employee was retiring, the brand and company name were sold to CH Distillery of Chicago's Pilsen neighborhood. Jeppson's Malört is named after Carl Jeppson, a Swedish immigrant who first distilled and popularized the liquor in Chicago. Malört (literally moth herb) is the Swedish word for wormwood, which is the key ingredient in bäsk. Malört is extremely low in thujone, a chemical once prevalent in absinthe and similar drinks.
I’ve noticed an increase in small distilleries creating their own versions of Malört over the past five or so years. It reminds me of the renaissance Fernet experienced 7 or 8 years ago. Malört is definitely an acquired taste—taking a shot of it feels like punishment—but if you enjoy bitter liquors, sipping some chilled Malört after a heavy meal might not be unpleasant.
I’d guess that bitterness is the flavor most people are least interested in exploring, and that makes sense. It doesn’t seem to have the same endorphin payoff as other tastes. It’s an interesting flavor, and I think you need to have an interest in digging into unusual flavors before diving into the world of bitter-forward spirits. I think it makes sense that the rise of better cocktails has led to spirits like Malört seeing growth.
Besk has existed for a long time in Chicago, which I've heard referred to as "good Malort." It has a brighter, anise-forward flavor which puts it more in line with Italian amari.
Most of the alternative, new Fernets I've tried want to be "Branca, but more approachable", which takes away a lot of what makes Branca so interesting. I don't know if "Malort, but less bitter" is as marketable.
Amaro is fairly sweet. Malort is closer to Jagermesiter, but with a much more bitter flavor. I'd look into Becherovka if you want something a little more "zesty"
I (a brit) have drunk Malört on a few occasions. It's foul, I only drank it because it was part of fun nights out with a group of work friends. My ex boss' review "the worst thing I've ever had in my mouth".
I'm Swedish, and this tastes exactly as I remember the Swedish "Bäska Droppar" ("Bitter drops"). I haven't had the opportunity to compare them side by side, and don't particularly wish to.
I used to think of it as the booze for a final stage alcoholic to get a reaction from a drink.
Try the exact same thing with Fernet instead. Or Averna, or really any bitter Amaro. They will provide better flavors but the same change to light beer.
the bar Little Brother in Austin has a fun deal. for $5, you roll a d20 and if you get a 20 you get a shot of whistle pig. anything 1-5 and you get a shot of malort.
We had a bottle or two in our FarmLogs (yc12) office. Would bring it out once in a while to celebrate something, and would always snag a noobie or intern to fall for the trap.
It's not just that it tastes bad. Elisir Novasalus tastes bad. Lots of things taste bad. Malort tastes like something you are not supposed to be drinking; like solvents, like something leaking out of the engine of a car. Not in a good way. It tastes like a bad product.
It was created by a Swedish emigrant. There's a lot of Swedish history and people in Chicago, so much so that Sweden maintains an honorary consulate general that has no official diplomatic duties but is there to maintain relations and participate in the many Swedish festivals that happen throughout the area.
edit: IDK how ethically right it is (in my opinion it is) but when posting paywalled content we should post the archive link directly or at least as part of the submission
That's good to know and terrible news. It looks like a different paywall than the one I see going directly to the NYT link, it let me view the article the first time and now simply entered an unresolving state.
Anyway shame on you NYT, this is like boycotting the web archive, ridiculous...
> It is also, in five words, the unofficial liquor of Chicago
No, it's a meme that hipsters have somehow latched onto because the Chicago aesthetic seems to be popular now.
If a native Chicagoan tells you that you have to have a shot of Malort when you're at the bar because it's the "unofficial liquor of Chicago" - they're pulling a prank. It's somehow lasted a century as a prank you pull on your buddies who don't drink that often.
I've seen it used more often as an initiation if someone has recently moved to Chicago. You welcome them to the city with a "Chicago Handshake" which is Old Style beer and a shot of Malort.
I live in the Chicago suburbs now and used to live in Chicago. Taking shots of Malört in bars is indeed a rite of passage for tourists, but yeah, it's a foul-tasting shot.
Democratic Illinois Governor J.B. Pritzker was recorded sharing shots of Malört with visiting politicians during the week of the Democratic National Convention. I enjoyed looking at the reaction of the visiting politicians after they drank it.
Pritzker is a rich guy who grew up in California and Massachusetts, so in Chicago he's an absolutely typical Malort drinker. It's become a big part of pretending to be local.
> Mr. Wurth, who tended bar in Chicago for 10 years before moving down South, takes Polaroids of Malört first-timers and asks them to write descriptions of the drink on the border. Hundreds of snapshots plaster the walls of the bar’s two bathrooms. A sampling of their tiny captions: “Swamp grass in July,” “Pain” and, Mr. Wurth’s favorite, “The powder inside of a balloon.” Malört turns even the most prosaic into unexpected poets.
I have not had Malort, but I have had absinthe, which I believe is similar? And I'd like to contribute.
I wouldn't say it tastes bad. If you drank boiling bleach, you wouldn't say it "tastes bad." That's not the right category of word. It tastes like something that should never, ever go in your mouth.
Absinthe has redeeming qualities, even if you don't enjoy the anise/black licorice flavor (which I do not). Malort does not. It really is a different beast.
My friends make a cocktail with Malort, White Monster, and C4 preworkout. They also have a multi-year running gag where they offer me a bottle of fine whiskey or bourbon at a campfire but it has in fact been replaced by Malort. Then, when I am choking and gagging someone else offers me some water to wash away the taste, which is in fact also Malort.
> Malort, White Monster, and C4 preworkout
What do they call this cocktail? I suggest "Malörtal Kombat".
The Grand Malort Seizure?
That's so funny. Water doesn't even wash away the taste anyway
> My friends make a cocktail with Malort, White Monster, and C4 preworkout.
Fuck me I almost gagged reading that. The rest is just a horror story. That would be the camping trip I return from alone and immediately call a criminal defense lawyer.
Lighten up and live a little. You have to be open to essentially harmless pranks like this or what kind of sterilized life are you living.
There remain jurisdictions in the United States where it is legal to shoot someone for replacing water with Malort.
I'm a complete weirdo apparently who really likes the flavor of malort, it's bitter and herbal and so if you like those flavors you'll enjoy it. I kinda resent the amount of marketing that the new owners have churned out hyping it up, although I do appreciate what they're doing.
If you think you might enjoy it, give it a shot I'd describe the flavor as sweetened church pew, then grapefruit bitterness. If you're not expecting it you'll almost certainly hate it, but it's really not that bad.
As a former Chicagoan I also enjoy Malört.
To my unstudied palate, it is the bitter cousin to Jaegermeister. It’s a bit more complex and more of a mature drink compared to Jaegers.
Jaegermeister is licorice flavored so I can’t take a sip of it without gagging. Does Malort taste anything like licorice?
I don’t think so. But both taste highly herbal.
I love the ads:
"Malort: Weeding out Chicago's weak since 1934"
"Malort: When you need to unfriend someone in person"
malört meaning wormwood, which https://www.etymonline.com/word/wormwood says may be an alteration of
> wer "man" + mod "courage," from its early use as an aphrodisiac
I find it just fine as well. I feel like a generation of marketing around Malort was "it's really gross!", but it's a distinct taste that I don't think a chunk of people would find so offensive if they weren't heavily primed before trying it.
I'd be curious how it fares internationally. To me it just tastes to me like an anise liqueur with a pronounced bitterness.
I wouldn't be in a hurry to take a big swig of it, but that strikes me a little bit like taking a big swig of soy sauce and concluding it tastes awful.
I have a theory that our flavor pallet is flexible, and if you continue to consume something your body things is nourishing, it'll eventually flip a switch in your brain where it becomes palatable.
I'm sure someone has done research on this, but I'm unaware of any.
I'm pretty sure this is known, at least for bitter tastes. Coffee, alcohol, bitter vegetables, dark chocolate, etc., tend to be acquired tastes to at least some degree. Even if you don't dislike them on first try, you probably grew to enjoy them more as you continued trying them.
I tried it hoping it would be kind of vaguely like Absinthe mixed with w/ grapefruit extract and quinine, but it just tasted like burning gasoline or jet fuel to me.
This is where it gets tricky.
Malort is bottom shelf example of a “Bäsk” liquor.
https://wikipedia.org/wiki/Bäsk
There are much finer versions of it, and if you’re in Chicago Binnies carries one by Letherbee “Bësk” and if you like that bitter grapefruit/wormwood flavor, it is mana from heaven
https://www.letherbee.com/products
Ironically, here in Chicago Malört has become so trendy that you'll sometimes end up paying more for it than you will for Bësk at a bar.
I also really like it, I have a bottle in the pantry.
The first time I had it (in Chicago of course), I asked the bartender what it tasted like before trying it as my friends had been building up how bad it was. She said, “It tastes like the day my Father left us.”
I have friends who make custom shirts with the Malört logo and the text “Malört: because fuck you.”
Every batch is different, some are more bitter than others. I think the new owners were planning to change that, but I feel like it hurts the appeal. The surprise is part of the fun.
I do not mind the taste, most of the time. Some bottles are especially bad though.
The batches being consistently less bitter is one of the first things I noticed about new bottles after CH acquired the brand.
I'm intrigued to try it. I wonder how much it overlaps with Gammel Dansk, which my cousin describes as "it's a like a cinnamon stick threw up"
Malort is bitter, but not high proof, so I personally find it much easier to drink than something with more alcohol (if just talking about a shot...)
> but it's really not that bad.
you're not selling me
That's because I'm not a salesman ;)
If you like bitter aperitifs, campari, jager, etc then you owe it to yourself to try malort. If you don't, then you can live without it.
I like mine neat with a couple dashes of bitters. It's a lovely sipping drink.
I hate that whenever I try to order that at a bar, the bartender thinks I'm just being an idiot to show off. I can't see how it's any more of an acquired taste than something like single malt or calvados. Which, coincidentally, also make for thoroughly disgusting shots.
I wouldn't down half a tin of breath mints in one go, either.
I like it too. Reminds me of Akavit, which I love.
As someone who loves akvavit, I find Malört absolutely disgusting.
Yeah, they took a quaint little dive bar thing and are turning it into a lifestyle brand.
I like it fine, it doesn't taste especially unusual among other herbal bitter liquors, a category I like. It's not the best (or as expensive as the best! they can get pricey), but it's not the worst, it's a fine drink.
The NYT story above mostly stayed away from how it's become known as like "the worst drink ever" or something, something you drink as a kind of challenge rather than that it's enjoyable.
I've suspected that the manufacturer has been actually encouraging this story. In the age of "challenges", a narrative that this is an incredibly hard to drink thing that's a challenge to drink is actually good marketting, that has been part of it's successful national awareness?
It's not especially challenging, it's just an herbal bitter, which is not for everyone, sure. But it's not gross, it's a fine drink -- and ironically saying this, that it's not actually exceptionally bad, hurts it's marketing! Better to be exceptionally noteworthy bad than simply typical.
==I've suspected that the manufacturer has been actually encouraging this story. ==
It is an explicit part of their marketing. This [0] excellent advertisement in Chicago states:
"Do Not Enjoy. Responsibly."
[0] https://www.reddit.com/r/chicago/comments/19dvd2j/brilliant_...
The liquor store I go to here in Chicago has a small Malort ad on a pole that says "These pants aren't going to shit themselves."
In Sweden it goes
1. eat rotten herring (which you'll not enjoy, because it's rotten fish, yo)
2. clean your palette with a disgusting shot of home made malört spirits (or aquavit, equally disgusting)
3. goto 1 until your drunk
4. get laid
Very, very, very few people ever reaches step 4.
Most commonly it is pickled herring. I don't think rotten herring is a thing in any broader circles.
Homemade bäsk is usually much better than factory made Bäska Droppar, if you enjoy the taste of wormwood more than just being slapped in the face with artificial bitterness and sugar.
Of course, if you hate the taste of fish, pickled things and spirits in general, you are unlikely to enjoy any of it.
Surströmming is not pickled but rather fermented
Also not quite the same as rotten! And, I would hazard a guess that the consumption ratio of inlagd-sill to surströmming is at least 1000:1, maybe 100000:1.
Aquavit equally disgusting? I guess I should try malört :) Aquavit with beer chaser and https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pinnekj%C3%B8tt is a great Christmas dish (but I would die if I didn't keep it to Christmas)
wish moxie brand sodas wouldve done a similar marketing strategy to gain a better foothold in the northeast market. they got bought out by coca cola and nerfed any bitterness to have it resemble more like a flat root beer.
not everything in life needs to be sweet.
Gotta add some Angostura bitters nowadays to give your Moxie some moxie.
What are some other liquors in its category? Because it's much higher proof and lower sugar content than the bitter liquors people drink more or less unmixed.
There are probably some similarly high proof amaros out there but they're pretty rare even within that category and an american would probably only encounter them mixed into a cocktail if even then. Fernet branca sure but that's much less bitter. Malort is actually very unusual compared to campari, or suze or something along those lines. Much more bitter, more alcoholic and less sweet than the norm for these drinks.
Yes, Americans don't historically usually drink amaros or bitters. Amaros seem to be gaining in popularity though, perhaps the malort resurgence is part of that trend.
Right, it's a herbal bitter, not citrus like campari. And not an especially sweet one.
I am not good at remembering brand names there are so many. One I enjoy that comes in tiny little bottles and does have a bit of a foothold in the USA is the digestif Underberg.
Sure, that whole category will be seen by some Americans who are not interested in bitter and digestifs as not particularly palatable. But still nothing special about Malort.
Wikipedia says "Malört is an American brand of bäsk liqueur, ", with bäsk being a Swedish wormwood-based thing. Googling for wormwood amaros finds a variety to try, if the wormwood bitters is what you're looking for. The good ones will taste a lot better (and be a lot more expensive) than Malort, because, right, Malort isn't especially great, it's true.
i had Malort for the first time only a few years ago. I was like, wait, this is it? OK, it's a not especially great example of the category, it's kind of mediocre, but I've drank plenty of the category and don't find it especially hard to drink.
But "a mediocre bitter digestif" is obviously not as good marketing as "the worst drink on the planet, drink it as a challenge and impress your friends".
I think Underberg is a good comp. The problem with Malort is not that its bitter or the flavor profile of it, its the _quality_ of the drink. Underberg is bitter but well made and it tells dramatically when drinking them side by side.
Amaro's generally speaking are _very_ popular in Chicago. When I first moved here and was more of an out at bars type of person it was _extremely_ common to drink Amaro, especially at the end of a work night. But you'd drink the amaro's you'd expect (Fernet especially). No one would choose Malort because it wasn't any cheaper than a good amaro and was just worse.
The story of Malort is the story of good marketing and pre-social media 'influencers' getting involved. The book mentioned in the article also covers the quirky story of the original Malort brand and its interesting if you like that sort of thing. But as a drink its just uninteresting.
Unicum might be another good comparable, that's actually good if you like that sort of thing?
You want something that I think really is so bad that I have trouble imagining it's not just a novelty challenge drink -- and yet I think it's not and some people really do like it -- while even sticking to Nordic region (they like some weird stuff)....
https://koskenkorva.com/en/koskenkorva-salmiakki
"Salty" licorice is a misnomer, there's nothing actually salty about it, the "salt" is ammonium chloride. It's vodka flavored with black licorice (I'm with you so far), and the taste of ammonia.
Oh yeah I'm not saying Malort is good. i find it mediocre. I feel like I've had worse (which I can't remember the name of because why). I enjoy em enough that if i was at a bar that only had Malort I'd drink it. (I don't like the menthol in Fernet Branca, although many do. Malort has no menthol flavor as I recall?)
But the marketing campaign, whether crowdsourced viral or intended, is that it's like this uniquely horrible thing.
If anyone is familiar with the category and enjoys it (certainly not everyone does), they won't find it particularly hard to drink or unusual. They will find it not very good, yes. Obviously that's not something you want to market.
As you say, it's not interesting. But "the worst drink you'll ever have" would of course be very interesting! It's not that Malort is great, it's that in fact it's not interesting at all, it's just a mediocre bitter digestif.
I think the Nordic countries' Aquavit is more like Malort than the Italian Amaros are.
Fun fact: The Nordics are so cold, to age their Aquavit in casks, some producers would load them up on ships and send them to the equator and back. Linie Aquavit still does this tradition.
Personally, Italian Amaros are much better than Aquavit or Malort though. Forget Fernet when there's Averna.
I don't think Aquavit is very similar to Malort at all. They lack the bitterness and extreme astringency. Aquavit is more like gin but with a different botanical lineup.
I thought it was pretty similar to Suze in bitterness, although I didn't try them side by side. It's about twice as strong, though. And neither is sweet enough to save you!
Have you tried Gammel Dansk?
I'm not sure. I was about to say yes but looking it up now probably what I had was arnbitter. I quit drinking over a decade ago too so I'm starting to get even more fuzzy on what I have and haven't tried.
> I've suspected that the manufacturer has been actually encouraging this story. In the age of "challenges", a narrative that this is an incredibly hard to drink thing that's a challenge to drink is actually good marketting, that has been part of it's successful national awareness?
The Streisand Effect works. Plus, in a crowded market, anything to set yourself apart is a win.
Their social media accounts at least absolutely lean into the "worst drink ever" reputation.
If you like Fernet?
Fernet is 100x better in every way.
That is not saying much coming from a guy who thinks Fernet tastes the way a mens room smells on a hot day when chilled.
You can’t be referring to me. I’ll do shots of Fernet all night long.
Fernet is delicious
Fernet tastes like mint toothpaste.
Then you will be disappointed by Malort, which is one-dimensionally vile and without any charm. The sad thing is Chicago is a big amaro town; Malort is to a serious amaro what a bottle of 70% isopropyl is to Glenrothes 18.
I always describe Malort as "it's like Fernet made Fernet in a shed"
Yeah, everyone knows that the real worst liquor ever is Ng Ka Py. Either they made it differently back then or John Steinbeck never actually drank it.
I happen to enjoy malort, so there's probably something wrong with me.
Malort has been seeing wider distribution recently, which i hear may due to a buyout a while ago. Their website lists distribution in Delaware, Maryland, DC, and randomly checking San Francisco shows availability as well.
No more having to visit Chicago to purchase it enables a lot more people to buy it and businesses to serve it.
The weird Chicago only malort variants do disturb me, but i would try them.
The burnt rubber flavor does grow on you. Kinda like how black coffee is a bit of an acquired taste.
From what I am reading Malort sounds like a bad combo between a disgusting smokey scotch* and Fernet, a liquor that tastes the way a public mens bathroom smells like on a hot day when chilled.
And you compare that to black coffee? Shame on you.
Malort tastes like extremely bitter grapefruit peel to me.
I also love my scotch as peaty as possibly. So most likely my taste buds are broken.
Fernet is dark and very herbally from my recollection.
They're not even in the same universe. I don't love Fernet, but I appreciate it, and can taste things in it; it tastes like lots of different herbs and spices, some of them unpalatable. On the other hand, to make homemade Malort, simply mix Windex, Everclear, and sugar.
Malort has been available at Total Wine and More for over a year. That's when I bought some and forced my friends into all trying it, and they all agreed it was terrible.
The variants are what worry me; it seems to defeat the purpose of a drink that built a reputation on being "unenjoyable" to make it more palatable while using the brand name for cachet.
All that to say, I tried barrel aged Malort -- it mellows down the flavor, so sure it's "better," but again what's the point? There are plenty of better tasting shots out there.
Malört is the name of the herb wormwood in Swedish. The swedish name means "clothing moth herb", and has been used to fight cloth moths among other uses. Also especially popular spirit flavoring, which it's latin name hints of.
Artemisia absinthium
I'd imagine there's as much actual wormwood in Malort as there is fruit in a Froot Loops.
Not sure about the ones mentioned in the article, but for the kind I'm used to (i.e Bäsk) in Sweden it's a given.
In our family it's generally been a tradition to go out in the night of August 24th each year to pick some wormwood, and then infuse some plain alcohol with it to have for the coming months. We generally don't leave it in as long recipes call for though, 24h instead of multiple days so the taste is a bit milder.
Anything special about August 24th that makes it the day to do this?
Its the day when all farmers should be done harvesting and autumn officially begins according to "Bondepraktikan" [1], which says to be done by St Bartholomews day.
Like many old traditions the reasons have for many become lost to time, and now it's an accepted fact that that's the magical night to get some wormwood.
[1] https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Old_Farmer%27s_Almanac
Wait. Fruit loops are made of corn. Corn is a fruit! :)
Jesus. I'm also today years old when I learned they're spelled Froot loops, not Fruit loops.
Yes, corn is a Froot, not a fruit. It's a common dietary misconception.
It's actually even worse - they're Froot Luips.
It's never Luips.
The only thing I know about Malört is that tptacek enjoys complaining about Malört, so I'm looking forward to learning even more about that one thing.
I think that it's unpleasant, but found that its reputation is greatly exaggerated. There are much worse liquors available if that's your jam.
By far the worst tasting thing I've had was Norwegian moonshine.
Don't drink Windex.
As a former Chicagoan I'd have to agree. I always thought Malort was just a running gag to play on visitors.
Without the purchase-to-fulfill-a-gag market, it probably would have shut down decades ago.
The new owners are a serious distillery, and doing the best job possible with the recipe. This will lead to people drinking it for reasons other than a gag, but will that grow to be enough to leave the joke behind?
It pisses me off, because there's no reason for it to exist. There are good products with the same flavor profile Malort attempts (and fails), but Malort swamps them in the market. There's even non-Jeppson Malort now. It's all a stunt.
Just chase it with an Old Style or twelve and whatever Malört tastes like to you will soon be only a nostalgic memory from your one trip late at night to Logan.
My first thought exactly! I have never heard of Malört outside of the cryptography/security industry, where offering it is seemingly used as a hazing ritual.
I went on a stag do (bachelor party for non-Brits) last year. The groom had just returned from Chicago on a business trip the morning we went away. He brought back a bottle of Malört.
I developed a taste for it that weekend - it's not that bad (I'd take it over something like Becharovka). Annoyingly years ago (2009ish) I spent a fair amount of time over in the Midwest with work and never drank the stuff.
Must be a British thing as I’m the same. Been to Chicago a few times and had a few shots of Malort and it’s totally fine. Maybe it’s the coriander-tastes-like-soap thing for some people.
Becherovka? I love that stuff. I'm afraid to try Malört though.
Ok, Malört is the name of an alcoholic beverage. It is unclear to me why a liquid would be called a "princess" but maybe it reflects the jargon of aficionados.
Malört was introduced in Chicago in the 1930s and was long produced by the Carl Jeppson Company. In 2018, as its last employee was retiring, the brand and company name were sold to CH Distillery of Chicago's Pilsen neighborhood. Jeppson's Malört is named after Carl Jeppson, a Swedish immigrant who first distilled and popularized the liquor in Chicago. Malört (literally moth herb) is the Swedish word for wormwood, which is the key ingredient in bäsk. Malört is extremely low in thujone, a chemical once prevalent in absinthe and similar drinks.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jeppson's_Mal%C3%B6rt
It's a reference to the Chappell Roan album "The Rise and Fall of a Midwest Princess" which has been a smash hit this summer.
Oh how fascinating. What is the connection between the beverage and album? Or is it just a spurious reference by the headline to drive engagement?
> What is the connection between the beverage and album?
Malort is from Chicago, which is in the midwest, and it's blown up in popularity lately. I don't think there's anything else to it.
I’ve noticed an increase in small distilleries creating their own versions of Malört over the past five or so years. It reminds me of the renaissance Fernet experienced 7 or 8 years ago. Malört is definitely an acquired taste—taking a shot of it feels like punishment—but if you enjoy bitter liquors, sipping some chilled Malört after a heavy meal might not be unpleasant.
I’d guess that bitterness is the flavor most people are least interested in exploring, and that makes sense. It doesn’t seem to have the same endorphin payoff as other tastes. It’s an interesting flavor, and I think you need to have an interest in digging into unusual flavors before diving into the world of bitter-forward spirits. I think it makes sense that the rise of better cocktails has led to spirits like Malört seeing growth.
Besk has existed for a long time in Chicago, which I've heard referred to as "good Malort." It has a brighter, anise-forward flavor which puts it more in line with Italian amari.
Most of the alternative, new Fernets I've tried want to be "Branca, but more approachable", which takes away a lot of what makes Branca so interesting. I don't know if "Malort, but less bitter" is as marketable.
Fernet is so good. Probably a good entry point to bitters. It is so nice with Diet Coke.
If I like Amaro, but haven't been a fan of Fernet, is Malort worth a shot?
Amaro is fairly sweet. Malort is closer to Jagermesiter, but with a much more bitter flavor. I'd look into Becherovka if you want something a little more "zesty"
https://archive.is/d30Rz
Love Malort, we serve it at my bar and it's absolutely something that grows on people.
It's basically a bottom shelf amaro. If you like amaros, you can probably find malort palatable.
But bitterness is a very divisive flavor so lots of people just have extreme reactions to amaros in general and malort in particular.
I (a brit) have drunk Malört on a few occasions. It's foul, I only drank it because it was part of fun nights out with a group of work friends. My ex boss' review "the worst thing I've ever had in my mouth".
I'm Swedish, and this tastes exactly as I remember the Swedish "Bäska Droppar" ("Bitter drops"). I haven't had the opportunity to compare them side by side, and don't particularly wish to.
I used to think of it as the booze for a final stage alcoholic to get a reaction from a drink.
https://www.raschvin.com/en/product/baeska-droppar-prima-sna...
As a Chicagoan, I enjoy Malort regularly, and I like to chase it with light beer. It makes the beer taste amazingly sweet.
Try the exact same thing with Fernet instead. Or Averna, or really any bitter Amaro. They will provide better flavors but the same change to light beer.
https://archive.is/d30Rz
the bar Little Brother in Austin has a fun deal. for $5, you roll a d20 and if you get a 20 you get a shot of whistle pig. anything 1-5 and you get a shot of malort.
What do you get if you roll 6-19?
sliding scale of other liquors of varying subjective quality
We had a bottle or two in our FarmLogs (yc12) office. Would bring it out once in a while to celebrate something, and would always snag a noobie or intern to fall for the trap.
Neat. What was the trap?
It tastes like roadkill soaked in turpentine.
It's not just that it tastes bad. Elisir Novasalus tastes bad. Lots of things taste bad. Malort tastes like something you are not supposed to be drinking; like solvents, like something leaking out of the engine of a car. Not in a good way. It tastes like a bad product.
I mean if you're not a heavy drinker, most liquor tastes like a solvent.
I am not a heavy drinker, and I absolutely enjoy all sorts of liquors: cognacs, whiskeys, vodkas, gins, etc... None of these taste like solvent.
malort definitely does lol
tastes like something you would pour into a chainsaw with that perfect 50:1 ratio of gas to oil.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
It tastes awful
I never understood why everyone hates this. I used to order a round of shots for everyone at the bar and they all hated it.
Even just reading the word Malört gives me Malört face.
The usage of the name is cultural appropriation.
It was created by a Swedish emigrant. There's a lot of Swedish history and people in Chicago, so much so that Sweden maintains an honorary consulate general that has no official diplomatic duties but is there to maintain relations and participate in the many Swedish festivals that happen throughout the area.
https://web.archive.org/web/20241115175926/https://www.nytim...
edit: IDK how ethically right it is (in my opinion it is) but when posting paywalled content we should post the archive link directly or at least as part of the submission
The archive link is also paywalled.
Actual full article: https://archive.is/d30Rz
That's good to know and terrible news. It looks like a different paywall than the one I see going directly to the NYT link, it let me view the article the first time and now simply entered an unresolving state.
Anyway shame on you NYT, this is like boycotting the web archive, ridiculous...
It’s disgusting. It’s liquid ear wax shared by people who like to piss other people off. I say this as a person who typically enjoys bitter.
Google's AI says that it "has a full-bodied flavor and tastes like pencil shavings, old battery rust, citrus zest, and ear wax".
…”and despair”.
Eh, I like Malort, and I'm not even from Chicago.
> It is also, in five words, the unofficial liquor of Chicago
No, it's a meme that hipsters have somehow latched onto because the Chicago aesthetic seems to be popular now.
If a native Chicagoan tells you that you have to have a shot of Malort when you're at the bar because it's the "unofficial liquor of Chicago" - they're pulling a prank. It's somehow lasted a century as a prank you pull on your buddies who don't drink that often.
If it's lasted a century as a prank Chicagoans play on people, it sounds like it is in fact a cultural touchstone.
I've seen it used more often as an initiation if someone has recently moved to Chicago. You welcome them to the city with a "Chicago Handshake" which is Old Style beer and a shot of Malort.
I live in the Chicago suburbs now and used to live in Chicago. Taking shots of Malört in bars is indeed a rite of passage for tourists, but yeah, it's a foul-tasting shot.
Democratic Illinois Governor J.B. Pritzker was recorded sharing shots of Malört with visiting politicians during the week of the Democratic National Convention. I enjoyed looking at the reaction of the visiting politicians after they drank it.
Pritzker is a rich guy who grew up in California and Massachusetts, so in Chicago he's an absolutely typical Malort drinker. It's become a big part of pretending to be local.
Yes, this, exactly.
The most annoying part of Malort discourse is that it’s changed since it was purchased by CH and isn’t nearly as strong.
It was never a good product. It's a bad product that people drink as a stunt or a prank.
Agreed. It’s just gross. However the part that gets me is it’s not even as gross as it used to be before it became “cool”.
First a hipster meme and then a forced meme by the makers to capitalize on it.
> Mr. Wurth, who tended bar in Chicago for 10 years before moving down South, takes Polaroids of Malört first-timers and asks them to write descriptions of the drink on the border. Hundreds of snapshots plaster the walls of the bar’s two bathrooms. A sampling of their tiny captions: “Swamp grass in July,” “Pain” and, Mr. Wurth’s favorite, “The powder inside of a balloon.” Malört turns even the most prosaic into unexpected poets.
I have not had Malort, but I have had absinthe, which I believe is similar? And I'd like to contribute.
I wouldn't say it tastes bad. If you drank boiling bleach, you wouldn't say it "tastes bad." That's not the right category of word. It tastes like something that should never, ever go in your mouth.
Absinthe has redeeming qualities, even if you don't enjoy the anise/black licorice flavor (which I do not). Malort does not. It really is a different beast.
That is impressive and terrifying.